Pregnant at 40

Pregnant at 40

I wasn’t always sure that I would have kids. When I got married at the ripe old age of 31, I figured at some point in the next few years but that point never came. It was the wrong person, the wrong time and for that reason it never happened. Grateful I dodged that bullet because we divorced and being a single Mom was never on my list of life goals.

I wasn’t  unhappy being childless, but figured that if it did happen it was meant to be and I would embrace it as part of my life’s journey. When I turned 40 last year, I just didn’t think it was in the cards for me. I didn’t see myself becoming pregnant at 40 and so I stopped thinking about it.

Funny how when you don’t focus on things they somehow show up in your life. Like when “how come I’m on the only one who’s single? I’ll be alone forever! “turns into finding the love of your life when you stop focusing on it. Crazy.

That being said, 4 months after turning 40 I got pregnant. Now this was not one of those “What the fuck? How could this happen?” moments. I was (and still am!) in a great relationship with a great man who is going to make an amazing father. I’m happy. We’re happy. And this baby will be happy too.

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Life always gives you what you need when you need it and so here I am 8 months later preparing to bring my first child into the world.  Now when I say preparing, I mean exactly that because no one knows less about babies than me. Some of the things I learned were shocking, some less so, but here are my favorite and least favorite things about being pregnant.BARBATO_MATERNITY_FINAL-4

Faves:

1. People are nice. They hold doors open when they used to let them slam in your face, smile and give up their seats in crowded places. Like bars. Because, yes, my friends still drink which means I still hit them up occasionally.

2. I have breasts. Yup. These babies have gone from a B cup to a D giving me all types of cleavage that I never had.

3. You can basically do whatever you want and blame it on the pregnancy. Don’t feel like showing up for that group birthday dinner? Plead exhaustion and head home. No one questions a pregnant lady.

Not Faves:

1. I have breasts. Along with breasts comes the inevitable trap for crumbs. Everything I eat falls down into that valley leaving me shaking out my shirt about 3-5 times during dinner. To add to that I now have to wear a bra. Not ideal.

2. I’m lazy. Not like normal lazy, I mean like I can’t even bother to put my dish in the dishwasher lazy. Or pick up something that fell on the floor. Sometimes the simplest tasks are just too much and the only thing I can do it lie on the floor naked. Literally. It’s my favorite place to be.

3. Unsolicited advice. Every random person you stand next to in line at Whole Foods wants to offer you advice on being pregnant, having babies, etc. Problem is, I don’t know you nor am I  remotely interested in anything that you have to say about your birth, breastfeeding, or what to do to make the baby sleep. Unless I ask you, keep it to yourself.

That being said, overall being pregnant has been pretty cool. No morning sickness, no strange cravings besides pancakes and best of all – no stretch marks. Does it mean that I’ll have another one? Who knows. All I know for sure is that for the next two months you will find me relaxing on the floor, eating pancakes, shaking crumbs out of my shirt and looking forward to the next stage of my life. Motherhood. Crazy.

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Photos by Lauren Ridge of Lily Sophia Photography.

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